Now that I have some free time after mid-sems are over, I came back to visit good ol’ faithful ChristopherKong.com. Seeing this page makes my heart break with pain (just like seeing Justin Bieber repeat the same dance moves over and over again in every music video of his; though, that would probably be more painful?). This blog is so dead, I don’t know what I can do to revive it. Well, I’ve had ideas and things I wanted to blog but there was obviously the “cbf” factor which was hid with the “can’t do it because of uni work rah rah rah AIDS is killing me factor”.
Thank you to all my loyal readers (yes! I still have some! ), even though all of you are probably pedophiles who according to the stat’s collected by my website come to read seedily worded stories. =\
Yes, I have decided to start this article with some single word to show how I have been absent from blogging for a while. To be honest, I’ve been pretty lazy to blog, have had exams, blah blah blah I’m just making reasons up so I can sound more secure rah rah rah.
And also… I’ve been starting entries, saving them as drafts and never finishing them a few weeks later only to start another entry (LIKE TODAY )
Anyway, life at the moment has been pretty much full of studying, studying and studying. Pretty much studying hard at home only to go and use web cams at school and refresh Onion News Network at school. I did spend a good 70 minutes in Biol today trying to learn how to do a Windsor Knot through a webpage where the images would not load because too many grade 8′s were probably playing stick man flash games (rebound stick man, jumping stick man, action stick man)
In fact, nothing loads on the school net anymore ever since more people have started using the wireless connection. SIF take 10 minutes to load a Wikipedia article (yes, i’ve been getting my biol research information from Wikipedia – don’t judge!)
However, while studying at school, I’ve noticed something about Facebook: it feels as if its taking attributes from my parents. I keep getting messages like this when I browse friends profiles:
So this little message would load mainly when I see facebook pictures of friends of mine who are couples or friends of mine who are holding hands or friends of mine who are NOT standing alone and wearing “conservative” clothing where the dress goes to to the ankle (NOT the mid thigh as someone’s ‘conservative’ dress goes to LOOOOL) and the only thing they show is their face.
Also, this reminds me of my parents really well. When I was young my parents used to watch all these DVD’s/Movies with me where there could have been ‘romantic’ scenes per se and many other things like James Bond referring to a lady by her first name. Now whenever a romantic scene where the partners engage in a embrace or a kiss, my mother would always run up and say “CUT CUT CUT CANNOT SEE THEM DO THE DIRTY” and I would be like “Mom, they’re just hugging =___=” where she would reply in some confucian way by committing the slippery slope fallacy stating that hugs lead to hands in wrong areas leading to arousal leading to clothes being taken off leading to SEXXX. Yes, somehow everything traced segued back to sex for her in a movie.
But it also made me wonder, why have a “Privacy” feature on facebook that blocks allowed users from content they’re allowed to see? Obviously it’s a glitch, but it brought me to the question: if you publish something online why would you want it to be “private”. Clearly, there is nothing private on the internet and if you expect some privacy you’re turned on as a guy who believes his girlfriend should use the douche method to avoid a pregnancy.
Hmm… I think I might include links to wikipedia articles on certain key words like… Facebook, James Bond and Douche method. XDD
LASTLY, while ALSO browsing facebook when studying (because I study VERY VERY hard). I came across a funny picture, see if you can spot the part which be pleasin’ to my humor (click to enlarge):
Yes, not only is it odd that all this persons friends are female (which I’ve seen among quite a few people on Facebook already – most likely guys who never actually TALK to said females) but people go about creating more profiles to befriend themselves. Or there could be a EXTREMELY LOGICAL reason to this which is that he has four brothers who LOOK the same, POSE the same and HAVE the same last name? Who knows. After the 6th child, Mr and Mrs. Parent could have thought, let’s just name them the same child to make it easier to call them when we yell out “XIAO SHU SHU LAI CHI FAN”. But perhaps not?
Anyway, it’s good to be back blogging again and I will try harder to be a better blogger next time by posting regular updateszzz and alllz.
Sleep time now because I’m vein and want my eye bags to go away. T___T HATELIFE.
So I’ve just tried to upgrade from WordPress 2.7 to 2.8.3 and well after not reading the instructions, it’s safe to say I’ve pretty much screwed everything up. Tip: Do NOT navigate away from the webpage before it says “Upgraded Successfully”
Hence, I’ve restored from a back up on Saturday night. All those stats and pedo search terms… Gone. </3
I have two assignment’s due this week (both orals, ironically) and essentially haven’t started doing anything on them. Well, I lied, I have saved a Word document for each assessment task with the to-be name of my speech typed in it. OP1, here I come? Essentially though, I’ve realized that when I’m in this situation, I should BLOG BLOG BLOG !
So recently I’ve been going to my fair share of open days and school event nights. Everything from private schools, public schools and even the even universities. So, hence the topic of the blog, I thought I might just write something about each one IN CHRONOLOGICAL ORDERZZZ”
a) TSXPO (Teritary Studies Expo)
Good Good Good. Best on freebies essentially. Most came from universities that aren’t essentially established as the major stand stone universities. Freebies collected where:
10 pens
5 sets of 5 growable basil seeds
3 arm bands
4 post it pads
3 notepads
1 ruler
3 cd/dvd’s
~4 inch high pile of booklets;
AND 17 of those enviro bags.
Haha, essentially the spelling of TSXPO is incorrect because they omitted the “E”. Who do they think we are if they were to include it? A bunch of sex mad teenagers? XDDD? Though I can see the seedy adults who would have gone if it was “TSEXPO”
b) QUT Open Day 26th of July
Surprizingly, QUT held a really good open day which I should give them credit for. I never considered going to QUT before that day but sitting in and listening to their LLB (Bachelor of Laws) presentation made me really reconsider. Everyone seems so friendly there and welcoming. Plus, out of all the universities I’ve had a look at, they were the LEAST stingiest on their freebies offered, receiving (can’t really remember but roughly):
7 packets of chips (Smiths brand)
5 bottles of QUT-branded water
3 enviro bags
4 pens
1571087190 x 10^22 blue tongue lollypops
3 stress ball apples;
and 5 QUT Law faculty branded mocks LOL
Good Good Good.
c) Undergraduate Medical Admissions Test – UMAT on 29th of July.
Essentially an aptitude test, UMAT essentially helped me narrow my career choices down to anything that doesn’t require mental capacity: lift operator, button pusher or TAFE (I kid I kid, please don’t hurt me).
As I was in the SECOND session, I got to ask a lot of the people in the first session what did they think of the test and how they the go in general (as well as the “WHAT QUESTIONS WHERE THERE ORZ ORZ ORZ” scenario). Essentially, everyone was too morbid to talk, but they did give me the advice of managing ones time well being essentially.
So I thought, Okay, I’ll sit down and look at the clock – working through the paper at a good pace. 59 minutes later in the first session of the afternoon test round I had 10-15 questions to go and 1:30 minutes left. FML. The last few questions of that section were essentially based on: “Wow, I haven’t colored a dot in that column yet, I should because it’s getting lonely over there and tests are ALWAYS patterned.”
Session 2 was the best for me – Understanding People. I found the questions in there fairly easy and a breeze!
Section three was a lot of “STAR, STAR, STAR,… ZOMG CRESENT MOON ! D:” reasoning. There was also a lot of hand movement from my table to reason which way the symbol went in some attempt of a logical thinking pattern. Although I guessed the last 10ish questions in Section 1, I think section 3 is my least confident area and will be my undoing. Who knew abstract reasoning could be so hard.
Also, what did people put for the last question with the ONE snail?
d) Brisbane Girls Grammar School Open Day on 31st of July
BGGS Open Day was actually really good. Went with parents and made the odd donation and had a look around. Kelly was good enough to give me a “Grammar Tour” around her school which was different to the normal tours they were giving. I now know things like where all the Asian girls hang out – though that likely won’t get me anywhere closer to an OP1.
I also tried some cupcakes that I think Christine made which were NOT TOO BAD to be honest. At the first they were a bit dry, but I think afterwards they have this really good aftertaste, which keeps you coming back for more.
As for the Woolcock Waffle Stand, I bought quite a lot of stuffz from there (mainly for the ice cream that came WITH the waffles and not the actual waffle). But hey, the money goes to a worthy cause I’m told.
e) UQ Open Day on 2nd August
UQ has the least amount of freebies of ALL the universities (two lol) that I’ve been to. The only freebies I managed to take were:
A chupa chup.
A ruler
A enviro bag
A subway cookie (which then someone rushed over after 5 minutes to prevent people from taking LOL)
Note the SINGULAR “A” in the quantative description?
I think UQ has the least amount of freebies because (and to quote Geoff from Musu’s blog (http://something-i-can-live-with.blogspot.com) “I think that’s because they know they can attract you with a reputable program leading to a recognized degree.” QFT.
I went with my parents who were quite impressed and encouraged me to go UQ because of the close proxmity to home (Mom: “I can drop you off, even though it won’t be a long car ride n_n”)
f) Queensland Academy for SMT 2009 Arts Showcase Night on 7th August
Good night overall, I got to see some people (who although didn’t go to QA as well) who also came along. I videotaped a performance that my friend Eric did (he’s in white lol). PRETTY GOOD IMHO.
Must watch. My parents also saw a painting which they think is my brothers (probably is) and now feel essentially really proud that he had his art work hung up. So proud, that dad even took a photo:
The Fruits of Kongmunism
And it was also really good to see Geoff and Johnny MC the night (though I didn’t get to see Johnny do ANY MC-ing of all LOL). The old ladies I stood next to all laughed really hard at Geoff’s jokes. Though, a lot of people did, it was the old ladies who I noticed laughed the loudest. So, ahmm Geoff, if you secure one you can make monies through inheritance ! Anyway, Geoff = Good MC.
Also saw Katie play her violin a few times (was good), which mom says was evident that “I should start learning the violin as well on the side of a brass instrument and piano as my friends do”. Thanks mom.
Freebies:
11 QA rebranded BIC blue pens.
g) MacGregor Open Day on 8th August
Essentially, my schools open day. I thought it was funny how they didn’t show new parents the Hall (because half the hall is missing and it’s dilapidated LOL) but instead sent all the presentations that had ALREADY enrolled students there. HAHAHAHA. Also, they finally opened majority of the toilets in the school after repainting them and locking them for the past 2 weeks. I guess they wanted the cigerette smoke/stinge to fan away and no one to tag the wals with “LALALALA 4114 WHUT !”. And to finish off, some photos:
Chris Yung and Carter Hui (who is showing his other name and split persona “Annie Lin”:
Japanese Exhibit: Chris Yung and Annie Lin/Carter Hui
And lastly, the dictator of Kongmunism with Julia and Mary:
I'm the one in the middle if you haven't figured that out yet LOL
Wow.. I think I’ve beaten my LONGEST BLOG WORD COUNT record. OOSP !
So I haven’t updated this thing excuse for a blog in a long time, and now I feel obligated to as one of my silent readers (i.e. Ivan) has persuaded me to. Lol, not really. As the title says, I’ll be using a lot of pictures in this blog to make up for the lack of content.
Anywho, remember that blog entry that I did earlier with that story featuring my friend, Rachel? Yeh, surprisingly what it has achieved what I wanted it to achieve. See if you can pick the odd one out…
(Click to enlarge, obviously)
Seeing this has inspired me that maybe my website would get more hits if I published similar stories OR just completely converted my website to some asian girl porno site. WHICH PROBABLY WON’T HAPPEN.
And just a quick question, how many asians have been completing their ritual dose of UMAT revision? I mean EVERYONE (except one to three) I’ve asked has been doing intensive UMAT revision, which has included their holidays. To be honest, hearing this has made me feel really insecure and left out. I mean, if you’re doing UMAT revision I feel obligated to do some UMAT revision just to ensure that we have the same advantage. Though, you can’t really REVISE for UMAT can you? It’s nothing you’re taught and essentially you have the skills required or you don’t. I mean, if you can’t answer this question:
Q: Bill has just walked in on his wife having sex with a goat. How does Bill feel?
Potential Answers:
A. Aroused
B. Surprised
C. Shocked
D. Disgusted
Anyway, if you answered A, then obviously you’re wrong (and screwed up – close the browser now. Google’s taken you to the WRONG result). But anyway, good luck to everyone who is doing UMAT this Wednesday. If you’re in the second session, you’ll be BLESSED with my presence (and probably a loud cuss from across the room in UQ center 5 minutes into perusal time).
I wanted to rant about Facebook quizzes and predictions, but I guess that will have to be ANOTHER time.
Yes, the adorable panda that no one wishes to eat says it all: BIRTHDAY CELEBRATIONS FOR ME. Except I’m not the panda; nor cute or adorable according to some people. It’s amazing how you can easily find cute and adorable pictures of Pandas on the internet. Plus, no one hates pandas as they are so interesting to watch:
I think when I’m reincarnated, I want to become a Panda in the Atlanta Zoo.
So anyway, for those who do not use facebook (or those who do, but do not have me on their friends list), my birthday was last Friday.
What did I do on my birthday? Well I went out with some friends in the afternoon after finishing my week long whore course = QCS. Although it was only the afternoon, we did manage to do many things such as LALALA Restaurant LALALALA Funhouse LALALALA Roma Street LALALALA your mom. n__n
I was thinking of doing a big birthday blog post and all (which is different to the usual complaining and ranting that goes on Kongmunist) but after a week of QCS prep school in THE FIRST WEEK OF SCHOOL HOLIDAYS I simply could not be bothered. But now I am in a mood where I can be bothered !
So, thanks guys for acknowledging my 17th year of living and stuffz. Thank you to everyone who thought of sending me a message through their cellular network (because no one calls as I am on three and you are on optus which means you actually have to PAY to call me), sent me a message through facebook/bebo, thought about saying happy birthday and considered saying happy birthday. THANKS !
Also, Happy Birthday to the people who have their birthday’s clustered around mine.. namely: Yvonne Ly, Julia Chung and Meila Wang.
On a more serious note though, *applies serious face* some people who have congratulated me on my birthday have asked why I didn’t tell people about my birthday (until it was too late and they discovered of facebook). Well, to be honest, birthdays right now are no longer big celebration for me. I was looking over photo albums from when I was young (i.e. toddler aged) and I think that then was probably the most celebration that I ever received in a birthday (doesn’t make sense, I know). It was nice looking at those memories though. Also, after last year, I just did not want to have birthday celebrations with what was perceived to be with a group of people. I mean, it’s not every birthday where you have a “friend” you wanted to spend time with rather run off at the end of the day with the guy that she had the hots for isn’t it? All in all, I guess I don’t really fathom the need to have one single day as a sort of self centered celebration of a persons life. To me, it was just any other normal day plus meeting a friend. I just don’t know why the tradition of a birthday as slipped for me, I really don’t. Part of me feels weird that I think this way which is obviously different to most people who I know. Nevertheless, although it is a birthday, I do not expect any of my friends to buy or give me a birthday present, it would be horrible of me to do so. I do appreciate the ones who go and buy a present for me, because I know that they have done it out of no pressure and they are doing it for their own like of and a token of appreciation to me. If I did mention anything like “where is my birthday present/what are you getting me for my birthday?” then it’s purely jocular and there is no real intention that you get me something for my birthday. But yeah, I’m not going to judge people on materialistic qualities or gifts that they have given me, that wouldn’t make me a true friend. Moral of the story: I’m just not big on birthday celebrations and expecting to receive gifts from friends; but to the friends who do give me something (materialistic/spoken/privately).. thank you, from the bottom of my heart (really. lol)
/end teenager corny moment.
In conclusion, I’m finally going to buy that R4DS that Sandra linked to me a few months ago. I can finally move into a new came other then Nintendogs. WINNER !
v3.0, just like the iPhone OS version 3.0 that I updated a few days ago. SUCCESS !
This is the probably the fourth time I find myself returning to blogging, which is similar to a fat man returning for his fourth serving of food at an all you can eat buffet.
Totally irreverent, but typing that reminds me of the time when we used to live in Regents Park (like really early primary school years) and we would end up occasionally going to the local buffet restaurant in Browns Plains. Having asian parents, they hammered into me the philosophy of ‘value-for-money’ early. Accordingly, I always treated these buffet restaurant occasions as a significant treat and did not go to these places not anticipating to eat a whole smorgasbord. I committed myself to eat the total cost of the entry ($15) in order to make the business lose and restore ‘asian-family-pride’. So I would end up going back to the buffet table 4, 5, 6, 7, nth amount of times just to ensure I had eaten my fair $15 cost. In the end, I could never achieve this and ended up feeling bloated and like a whore who’s just had 3 guys filling her (food being my guys, of course).
Anyway, I think I’ve probably lost most my friend reader base due to the lack of updatasian and all; however, it is still good to know what I have my pedophile demographic who frequent on my site with mistaken search queries under the assumption that they will see naked nu rens. Though, through my self imposed hiatus I have managed to think about what I wanted to blog about and the direction I want my blog to take. I want to blog about things that are topical and will get me higher up on Google search rankings.
So what have I been up to during my self imposed hiatus? Well, I’ve been studying for my block exams, thinking of the R4 that I plan to buy eventually, weighing up phones to buy, and having facebook flame wars.
It all started when i typo’ed “find” to “fine“. Thankfully, I had Josh Kong correct me by telling me that I am a re-a-tar-ded and using his superior BGS knowledge and spelling to show me how to really spell. I’ve obviously left some parts out, but to understand how the conversation went, you only really need to read the parts I’ve taken out.
And later on, Josh Kong commits the fallacy of “Hasty Generalization”, “Non-Sequitur” but has also made a bad Analogy in line with the principles of Philosophy and Reason/Logic:
Thankfully, he doesn’t study Philosophy & Reason though, or he would be scolded by his asian parents.
Yes, I also know that I should find more productive things to do and being older and all should have realized that this was surely going to be a waste of time. But hey! I couldn’t help my self and wanted to be included into the “not-studying-before-block-exams-and-during-block-exams-especially-the-night-before” club that everyone is raving about.
I’m not accusing all private school kids of being snobby and cocky idiots; however, there are a large majority of them. I feel that I have been blessed to meet a few. Some of the smartest and friendliest people who I have ever met have been private school people who have actually made me really happy over the past few years and who also look upon people equally, public or private student. In fact, there are quite a few who I regard as close friends. There are a few however who act like tools, with superior hierarchal views (which will get you no where in the real world). People like this should be handled in accordance with the following as a guide (which I found lying around dad’s desk and lecturer notes – WIN):
things found around the house - WIN !
The fact is that not every child of wealthy parents chooses to attend a private school – not attending a private school and choosing a public school doesn’t make one inferior for doing so. So uhmm… if you read this, please reply back to the facebook thread. So many people are waiting for this so called ‘evidence’ of yours that will damn public schools for eons to come. People are waiting for a laugh and now I have time and all during my school holidays (which started a week later because as you quoted “public schools suck”) which means that I can sit by my computer and wait for facebook notifications saying you commented on Kelly’s status.
Also, I’m stuck with a troubling dilemma: Samsung Omnia or Apple iPhone 3G S. Oh the decisions !
Let’s all play a guessing game. I’ll act like someone and then you guess the rest:
“I’m a girl who believes it’s okay to go around kissing another guy behind my boyfriends back on the account that I’m going through a rough time, but that relationship ended. I’m with a new guy though and exams are coming up, so that will be a rough time? Therefore, it’s okay to go around screwing other guys, yeh? n_n”
Chocolate bar to whoever guesses the right character.
Okay, its finally time for me to do some sort of commitment and entry into my blog (because my last one was about two weeks ago). To be honest, I’ve been really hesitant to blog over the past few days because of the increased views I’ve had over the past two weeks in response to my ‘creative’ story. I’d just like to include some of the search queries that my new visitors/readers/lurkers/pedophiles/seedy old horny men use to stumble upon “the inner thoughts of a kongmunist n_n”:
Naked Asian Girls
Young Asians
Underage asian
Pole Dancing Girls
Initiation gone wild
Rainie Yang Lesbian
Horny Girls Making out Lesbian
Though this is not all of them, these were some of the more recent terms that I’ve found linked. The increase of views was shocking and I didn’t know that simple keyword stories aimed at one portion of the market would attract so many new readers. In fact, the popularity of this new style of genre has made me reconsider what ChristopherKong.com will be. I mean, why make a blog when you only get a certain amount of views when you can make a website that will attract more readers and thus earn you more money. Hence, I’m contemplating to turn ChristopherKong.com into some pornographic website when I can role in the dough from horny acne-populated men.
I’d also like to thank Rachel Lee (not Tan n_n, and not the fat one >__>), who has kindly been advertising me in her Personal Message for the past few weeks:
the cheapest form of advertising: friends (IN A NON BEING USED WAY)
Today was pretty much spent studying at the State Library. I have a shitload worth of Philosophy & Reason material to revise before the test on Wednesday and Friday. I am quite proud of the amount I managed to revise through (i.e. all the content we need for the term). Now all I need to do is put it into practice which I think will be a bitch. Philosophy is a subject where there is a lot of reading, followed by a lot of exercises which gives you the equivalent feeling of anal rape. Also, interview’d by Eric and his friend (zomg if I’m wrong correct me) for something about a TOK presentation their doing on obesity? They asked questions about “What do you think when the term obesity comes to mind?” and “Why do you think people are obese?”. Come to think of it, I think my replies were REALLY shallow. LOL. So I’m hoping that it’s not going to be prime footage used in a PowerPoint or something that is sent to Cardiff for moderation. XD
We also have a new student teacher in Chemistry. Don’t get me wrong, I think its great that students are getting experience in the “real world” (haha he’s from QUT) by teaching students in a fun mock classroom BUT I do have a problem when it’s grade 12′s he’s teaching. I mean, we’re in our final year and the last think that we SAI-conscious/OP students need is a teacher who is learning the ropes. If they want guinea pigs then they should go to the year 8′s where experimentation is okay. This week he was trying to teach us about about equilibrium constants and their relationship to quotients he said “What happens when the quotient is more than the equilibrium?” to which I sheepishly raised my hand and said “This means the concentration is more then then equilibrium constant and the system will move from right to left, products to reactants, until the system re-establishes equilibrium”… “Sorry, you’re wrong” he said. Shocked, I tried not to blush in embarrassment and just listened to him explain what was correct “Reaction goes left to right” until someone confirmed what I said. He took a while to realize, and then was like “Okay, let me redraw the concept… Reactions go right to left..” ZOMG. NI SHI LOSER. T___T
This reminds me of Ms. Potter; WHO, might I add, did NOT perform any magic on us in order for us to grasp the QSA Senior Chemistry Syllabus (you can just tell when half the class practically fails). In fact, the only think I think I learnt from Ms. Harry Pothead was that her favorite band was “Plain White Stripes” (singers of ‘Hey There Delilah’ and any other song that makes girls cream) most probably due to the fact that she wasn’t getting any the use of ‘romantic lyrics’ – Pothead, 2008.
QCS practice makes me realize how bad this year is going to be for MacGregor. There was a ONE star question where we had to calculate BMI (formula weight in kilos divided by height in METERS NOOBS METERS) and we were given details of 78 kilograms with 180 centimeters. I’d like to quote some MacGregor students:
“OI KIEEENNTTT.. why am I getting 0.0024 for me BMI”, “that’s the right answer… yeee boiii!”
That and also the fact that although they were aware that there was two places for CEP that day (library for non OP, hall for OP students); a number of students didn’t realize they had to go to the library if they weren’t doing OP despite the fact that we were 30 minutes into an OP/QCS presentation. Yay Fail More Please. = =”
Also, I’ve updated the title of my blog to “the inner thoughts of a Kongmunist n_n”. Get it? KONGmunist. KONGmunism. Haha, I’m lame but I thought this was a pretty leet title. I can already imagine some of the propoganda posters: “Jiang B** L**g shi wo men xin zhong de hong tai yang. <3″. Also, a picture of Kevin Liu’s zui ai de political leader:
Another long weekend has passed, and I have been ever more productive then evahhz. Not really.
First of all, Zhu Ni Sheng Ri Kuai Le for Rachel Tan: http://rachel-maykay.blogspot.com
Buddha fest was on the weekend and apart from helping out I was able to receive spiritual enlightenment. Well, actually, in my opinion Buddha Fest last year was better than Buddha Fest of this year. Primarily because SO many things were moved which upset the natural wheel of karma and rebirth (trying to work in buddhist terms here). Nevertheless, I learnt the importance of one work: amitofu.
Amitofu. It’s a flexible word that can literally be used any time, any where and for any situation. Every monk I walked past on Saturday and Sunday said “Amitofu” and I greeted them back with another “Amitofu”. This four syllable word is one that is universivally understandable, fills in pauses and as well as breaks the ice in awkward converstions. Here are some examples”
Person 1: “Hello Chris”
Chris: “Amitofu n__n”
Person 1: “Mom, Dad, I’m gay/a slut/the complete embodiment of a whore”
-parents jaw drops-
Person 1: “Amitofu”
-family then breaks out into some KFC happy time commercial-
Person 1: -farts in lift-
-Awkward silence-
Person 3: “Amitofu” n__n
See, it’s a really flexible word isn’t it?!?!
It’s funny though because you always have people going “Wow. Did you go to/are you going to Buddhafest on the weekend?”. It was like the million dollar question of the week. I bet you half the teens who went wern’t even buddhist but were looking for a way out of their hardass asian parents so they can meet their girlfriends/boyfriends and make out simultaneously while the fireworks spectaculor happened. Which, I don’t think was that spectacular. Come to think of it, that’s probably what the slut was doing. n__n
Lastly, in an attempt to increase search rankings of christopherkong.com on Google, I’m including a story that I made from Rachel’s (not Tan) display pictures taken from on Buddhafest (words that are bolded are the ones aimed at increasing rankings obviously). Before I start though, WHY IS “in class – what is feminism?” HIGHER RANKED ON TEH GOOGLE THEN MAI BLOGGY?. Anyway, story time:
Series of Misfortunate EventsAsian Parents Worst Nightmare
Title changed to avoid copyright law suit by Warner Bros.
One day in the world of Buddhism and spiritual enlightenment. A young girl named Rachel decided to visit the festval celebrating the birth of ze Buddha. This was Rachel’s first time and she was quite unsure about venturing into the big bad world of religion (and subsequently her religionity (religious virginity)) and anywhere that was 1 kilometer from the epicenter of Sunnybank (Epicenter of Sunnybank = Market Square, place that NEVAH closes on any public holiday as I discovered today). However, with her young female friends she felt safe.
Rachel felt quite hungry and she with friend decided to venture into the world of Asian eateries.
faces are blurred for obvious bao hu-istic reasons
She didn’t know what she was about to get herself in to however; as before the drunkness, the innocent Rachel sits with a friend at said asian eatery to consume edible foods. However, her friend was wearing red which symbolized passion, fire and devlish thoughts of getting Rachel drunk and committing a series of Asian Parent Nightmares. (HENCE SHE WAS WEARING RED PEOPLEZ). Soon later, Rachel falls under a drunken spell and unaware that she is all boozed up, now decides to move out with another friend who would begin the initiation.
she yearned to be set free, rash-free that is
As she ventured out into the world known as Southbank she found a conventiently situated hard pole. Rachels inner spirits had escaped and the academic student wanted to show what her true ambitions were. She grapsed the pole with one hand and then the other sliding up and down. This was the job she wanted. The inner pole dancer within her, the inner pole dancer that was yearning to be released, the inner pole dancer that was entraped within was now the one that she proudly showed off. She was admired by her crowd of two Xiao Hai Zi’s. These Xiao Hai Zi’s said “Ma Ma, when I grow up, I want to be just like her. YI YANGGGG~~~~~ LIKE RAINIE YANG“. Although, this could have also been an indication that she had a rash that she was trying to scratch against the pole. Either way, Rachel was now out of control and was a Asian girl gone wild.
The next day had now come and Rachel on a uncontrolled spree found a bench to share with her friend:
there was a price to pay for using the bench, but she didn't mind n_n
As she sat there with her friend, she realized something. She was a lesbian. Longing to find acceptance, she tells her feelings to a close friend. This friend understands so much that they now share in a long embrace with each other. The sun rises slowly from its slumber and all sadness that was cloaked over her in the previous night (and years when she was in the closet) were now gone. However, her parents soon walk past satisfied of their performance after the “Annual Fei Yu Chin square dancing competition” and were stunned to see what had become of their Nu Hai Zi. The oh so very strong radiance that their happiness had given them was now stolen by a cloud of melancholy. What were they going to do now? Their young daughter had become something they never expected. By not to worry, she was still underage and this was illegal. All was not lost… They needed to do something, but what?
Zomg, I’m going to add more keywords later and tags for Google.
BY THE WAY, this is all another lame joke. Rachel and I are friends, I do not hate anyone mentioned in this short story, it’s just something creative I thought of doing to increase blog views over MSN Saturday night. Obviously this will be taken down if the parties involved want it to be. Also, it was nice studying with Rachel today at SLQ despite how self-conscious she happens to be LOL. And I did NOT death stare anyone hu hu hu hu. D:
INCREASE IN 40 YEAR OLD DEMOGRAPHIC PEDO WITH NO CHILDREN WHO SIT AT THEIR COMPUTERS ALONE AT NIGHT HERE I COME. n__n
(also, I’m helping you here Police, you can thank me laterz)
Part 2 of Task 2 for the maths assignment, ccooommppllleeeetttteeeee. I now feel like one of those shoddy doctors who googled “Online Ph.D Generator” and got their Med. Degree thanks to their ISP and the Hewlett-Packard Company.
I’ve just finished watching Law and Order as well as a bit of the show Life on Mars. I have to say, I quite like the whole Law and Order series probably because of the crime scene and it’s dramatic reenactments staged within it. You know, the scenes where the baddies get caught and they always act so melodramatic that their conviction is wrong, or what they did was considered to be a ‘service’ to society. Yeh that.
I’ve been planning to blog all week, but there was the cbf-factor which was multiplied significantly during the week days. There were also a lot of assignments which made me want to go back to preschool. Back to a time where one only worried about how much play-do they received and how not to share it. I’ve been so swamped with assignments that it’s made me very miserable. However, we’re half way through though guys.
Good luck to Larissa though who has her final IB exams starting next week – English A1 I think. Isn’t it good to know that the majority of your mark rests on exams at the end of your two years work. Also, if you fluke these exams it’s like your whole future is doomed. No pressure though, it’s only the most important exam for any IB kid I guess.
I’ve started to expand my business horizons, and by that I mean, take advantage of the current market. Many of you readers may already know that we are already faced with the severe disease also known as Swine Flu. This disease is deadly and will cause patients to suffer horrible pain and insufferable deaths. Deaths that you wouldn’t even wish on the worst of sluts. Unless… (for another time)… However, the chance to protect your family is NOW here:
protection
I’m selling face masks. These face masks are BETTER then the ones you get at the chemist because the come with mini respirators within. With this face mask you can now protect your family from the deadly swine flu causing pathogens and look like the hero of your local community. Anyway, ONE mask will set you back $1.95 and a pack of 10 masks will be $15.85. Good Value, I expect them to sell quick so buy NAO! Ahmm, yeh. Contact me if your interested in face masks. XD
Festival of Buddhism this weekend, YAY. Study, negate the YAY. =\
Zomg this blog post sucks. Nevarhhhh blogging at midnight eveh again.
), even though all of you are probably pedophiles who according to the stat’s collected by my website come to read seedily worded stories. =\
)
